


Interview

by totalizzyness



Series: 00Q Prompts [5]
Category: James Bond (Craig movies), James Bond (Movies), Skyfall (2012) - Fandom
Genre: Bond is a terrible person, M/M, just awful
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-20
Updated: 2012-11-20
Packaged: 2017-11-19 02:32:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/568075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/totalizzyness/pseuds/totalizzyness
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>Prompt: Q applied for a job at SIS (MI6). Bond somehow is Q interviewer. Because of the top-secret nature of the job, Q has no idea what he has got himself into.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Interview

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into 中文 available: [Interview](https://archiveofourown.org/works/861348) by [AprilforSpring](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AprilforSpring/pseuds/AprilforSpring)



Bond had no idea why he was here interviewing this… kid. He was told some bollocks about other people having better things to do, and it was going to be his quartermaster, so he may as well get to know him. Or something. But this kid couldn’t be more than fifteen? Sixteen? He took a quick look at the file. Twenty-three? Bullshit!  
  
He’d already gotten the job, there was just one final interview that Bond had to conduct. He was given no questions, or any guidlines to what he should ask. It was just him and this kid in one of the interview room.  
  
The kid in question was sat opposite, his fingers drumming nervously on the desk. He was all skinny, gangly limbs and a mop of messy brown hair. Innocent, enquiring eyes hiding behind a pair of thick-rimmed glasses. His suit was rumpled, his tie knotted messily around his scrawpy neck. Bond was sure he could wrap his entire hand around the skinny little neck and throttle him without even trying.  
  
His new Q peered up at Bond suspiciously. The interview had officially started five minutes ago, and Bond had yet to ask a single question. He hadn’t even introduced himself. Q nervously cleared his throat, catching Bond’s attention.  
  
“Um… are you going to ask me anything?”  
  
Bond cleared his throat, sitting up straight. “Are you actually twenty-three?”  
  
Q’s eyes narrowed. “Yes.”  
  
“Really? You look about twelve.”  
  
“Oh… Well, I’m definitely twenty-three.”  
  
Bond looked down at the file again. It didn’t have his name, Q no longer had a name, he was ‘Q’ now.  
  
“Sorry, who are you?” Q asked, nervously pushing his hair from his eyes. Bond smirked, closing the file and dropping it on to the desk He held his hand out, Q took it warily.  
  
“Bond, James Bond. Agent Double-Oh-Seven. You’re to be my new quartermaster.”  
  
Q’s eyes lit up slightly. “Oh, wow… Okay.”  
  
“Do you know what that means?”  
  
“Um… Not exactly, no.”  
  
Bond chuckled humourlessly, trust MI-6 to hire some spotty little kid with no idea of what he’s supposed to do. “How are you with guns?”  
  
“I’ve… never fired one in my life. Or held one.”  
  
“What about gadgets? In general?”  
  
“Well, I’ve fashioned a few of my own?”  
  
“Anything explodable?”  
  
“No… It’s hard to get ahold of the necessary tools without being flagged by MI-5.”  
  
Bond smirked. “Yes, they do like to stick their noses in where it’s not wanted. So… What would you say are your… skills?”  
  
Q frowned, his fingers drumming on the desk again. “I’m very good with computers. Give me ten minutes and I can hack in to any network you want. Well… if you want North Korean missile plans, I may need up to half an hour? But they’re yours.”  
  
“Is that so? Tell me, how were you approached for this job?”  
  
“Um… I’d just finished hacking in to MI-5’s security system, about to leave a message telling them to maybe update their system when two men in suits knocked on my door. I was brought here and… offered a job.”  
  
“Who offered this job?”  
  
Q cringed. “A very scary looking lady.”  
  
“White hair?”  
  
“Yes.”  
  
“Permanent scowl?”  
  
“Yes.”  
  
“No sense of humour?”  
  
“Yes?”  
  
“Tell me, did she have a God awful bulldog on her desk?”  
  
Q quirked a small smile. “Yes.”  
  
“Very good… I’m assuming you were assigned to me for a reason… So… what do you know about espionage?”  
  
Q’s eyes widened. “Espionage? You mean, spying and… all that jazz?”  
  
Bond smirked, interlacing his fingers on the desk. “Everything. Gizmos, gadgets, gun fights, exotic locations… it’s all very exciting.”  
  
“Oh…”  
  
“Do you have a strong stomach?”  
  
Q shook his head. “Not really, no.”  
  
“What are your opinion on beautiful women in short, sleek dresses?”  
  
“Um… I don’t have an opinion on women in general.”  
  
Bond squinted at the younger man. “Why?”  
  
Q coughed nervously, eyes darting around the room. “Does it really matter?”  
  
“To me it does.”  
  
“I’m… I’m gay.”  
  
Bond’s eyes widened; he quickly picked up the file again. “Oh, right. I’m sorry.”  
  
“I mean, if you asked me my opinion on muscular men in tailored suits then…”  
  
Q’s eyes widened too before he coughed nervously again. Bond quickly looked down at himself, quirking a smile. He was a muscular man in a tailored suit. Interesting…  
  
“By curiosity… What are your opinions? On well dressed, muscular men?”  
  
Q shook his head. “It doesn’t matter, really. Next question please?”  
  
Bond smirked. “So… What are your opinions on inter-office affairs?”  
  
“Well… it’s none of my business, I suppose.”  
  
“What would you say to being in one?”  
  
Q eyed Bond suspiciously, taking note of the way his eyebrow was arched suggestively, the way he was leaning forward ever so slightly. “Are you… propositioning me, Mr Bond?”  
  
“I’m not doing anything. Answer the question, Q. Would you ever consider being a part of an inter-office affair?”  
  
“Well uh… It would depend on who with. I mean… I don’t risk severe punishment for just anyone…”  
  
Bond grinned. “Well, you’ve already got the job. Welcome to MI-6. Have you any questions?”  
  
“Just one. Um… what have I gotten myself in to, exactly?”

**Author's Note:**

> Also posted on my Tumblr; [[link](http://the-nerdinator.tumblr.com/post/36106341716/im-sorry-i-didnt-really-know-what-to-do-with)]


End file.
